Here we go again! It's been over five years since I wrote about the positive ways parenthood can shape our professional lives. After what I can only describe as a roller-coaster of a year, I'm thrilled to share that my family and I welcomed a healthy baby boy in July 2024.
Yes, I am a father for the second time. For those who followed my earlier post on how fatherhood helped me become a better professional (if you haven't, you can check it out How Paternity Leave Taught Me Valuable Lessons For A Better Professional | LinkedIn), I'm here to reflect on what's changed - and what's stayed the same - since I first embarked on this journey.
Looking Back: A Quick Trip Through History
I had to go back and read again my previous article and reflect on the changes in my life on a personal and professional level to really understand the journey so far. I had thought that 2020 would be the most impactful year of our lives, a black swan event with unprecedented global pandemic, socio-economic challenges (Black Lives Matter movement) and an uncertain labor market situation. For sure such turbulent times cannot come again, right??
The trip down the memory lane was both sweet and difficult at the same time. We all say, "History is the best teacher" but very rarely do we really revisit our past. So, let's take a look at what has happened in our lives since 2020.
January 2021 shook the world with the US Capitol attack, followed by a lone container ship blocking the Suez Canal and freezing $9.6 billion in trade. Soon after, the Russia-Ukraine conflict dragged on beyond all predictions, driving energy prices sky-high and triggering surges in inflation and interest rates. In the midst of all this upheaval, remote work soared - only to be tugged back onsite, sparking nonstop debates on which model will prevail. And then there were two significant events which have impacted all of us in our professional or personal life in one way or another.
· Tech Layoffs - The increase in inflation and thereby increased interest rates by the banks resulted in mass layoffs in the Tech and Startup ecosystem which have historically been chasing debt-fueled growth. Such was the economic scenario that Jeff Bezos himself commented "batten down the hatches" in October 2022. The last 3 years have not been kind to the tech sector. More than half a million people have been affected by these layoffs. Last time I witnessed such a bad employment scenario was after the global financial crisis of 2008. I remember the statements of "These situations are extreme outliers and will not be repeated again". Well guess what, it's been repeated, again. Once again, the market is flooded with wonderful, ambitious professionals who at one point were having the best career prospects and are now suddenly struggling and putting "Desperate for work" tags on their LinkedIn profile. At the time of writing this article, Meta has laid off another 3,600 employees.
· AI had its Apple moment - The release of ChatGPT kicked off an AI war between OpenAI (ChatGPT), Microsoft (Copilot), Google (Gemini) and Amazon (Amazon Bedrock). This has started an AI frenzy in the market rivaled only by the IT boom of the 90's and the Crypto craziness of 2010's. Just the sheer speed of development and new evolution in the AI ecosystem is unprecedented. It's exhausting just trying to keep up with all the new releases, products and capabilities being launched every single day (Deepseek!!). But as quickly as it started, we are already witnessing signs of Investors looking for returns on their investments leading to calls of an "AI Bubble" in the market.
I chuckle at how I once believed 2020 was "the craziest year." Safe to say, the last half-decade hasn't been dull.
My Personal Roller Coaster
While all these global events have had a profound impact on my professional career (I have lost count of the number of articles and posts on LinkedIn on how Product Management as a career is finished and that AI will do everything I do), it's my personal journey which really takes the cake. From moving to the UK in 2022 and then moving back to Spain again in 2023, juggling new roles and career challenges, it's been very dynamic 5 years.
Yet the biggest and brightest thread in my life has been watching my daughter grow. Her first steps, holding my hand as she walks on the beach for the first time, the first time she called me "Papa", or the first pony ride she took where I wouldn't even let the handler lead the animal. I held on to her every step of the way (overprotective much!). But this reflection also made me remember the number of times I got angry at her because of problems at work, the "sorry darling, papa has to work" when she wanted to play with me. Those memories stung as I read my old reflections, because they reminded me how easy it is to lose sight of what truly matters. I dug deep to understand the motivations for my career changes, the challenges it brought with it and how it has impacted me to be the professional I am today. Being brutally honest with ourselves is one of the most difficult processes any professional can go through. But it Is so important for your self-growth.
I will not lie, the last 5 years have changed me, profoundly. And it's not just a beard with more white hair than black or my rediscovery of the sport which I had given up on playing years ago (Cricket!!). I am still trying to understand how I have changed. But I have noticed that I have become decisive, more action oriented, more aware of how things are happening in the world and how that impacts me and my family, more centered and very clear in what I really want in my personal and professional life. The birth of my second child and the subsequent paternal leave, once again gave me the time to reflect and reminded me how much our children teach us while we teach them.
Father of Two: Renewed Lessons for Life and Work
In caring for both my children, I've realized anew how many parenting lessons translate into core professional skills. Here are some insights that might resonate with any fellow parents or professionals.
Exponentially Increased workload - When my daughter was born, for the first 6 months, I was in survival mode. I never knew how precious time was until I had none. So, when we were preparing for the arrival of the second one, I did the normal 2X calculation for my time commitments. Boy, was I wrong about the workload. With 2 kids, you are switched on all the time, no breaks, no time-offs. And if you are taking care of both of them together, it's like giving 200% attention all the time.
When I went back to work after my paternity, I had a déjà vu moment while planning delivery roadmap. Managing two parallel product development pipelines is never a neat 50-50 split; it often demands 100% effort for both projects. Remembering my at-home juggling act helped me plan more realistic timelines, ensuring my team wasn't overloaded or over-committed.
Every Child (and Project) Is Different - Parenthood is the most important job in the world. No arguments there. However, it's also the one where there is no training/handbook/guide to prepare you. I had thought that since we were able to keep our daughter alive and healthy, the second one would follow similar patterns. NOPE! While my girl was quiet and calm, this one came out screaming his lungs out, hungry like a hippo and physically twice the size of a normal kid. Even now, I am constantly running out of clothes for him as he is growing like bamboo. He didn't take the pacifiers which we had used for our first child or any other baby items from the first foray. We had to shop for new pacifiers, new bottles, and adapt our routines all over again.
Back at work, I realized it's not very different in professional setting as well. I've seen the same variation when rolling out new product features or integrations. Past successes can guide us, but complacency is dangerous. We should never assume an approach will work the same way twice. Each client or module may require fresh tactics, just as each child demands a unique parenting style. We need to be open and present in the moment to adapt our response to the situation.
Setting Boundaries (and Sticking to Them) - Actually I was informed that this would happen. And I could see it coming from a mile away. After all, my daughter is a genetic combination of two very strong personalities, and she has shown a stubborn streak since she was a baby. So, when she started pushing the boundaries of what she can and cannot do at home/school, we were ready. Me and my wife had already aligned on showing a united front and agreeing on the rules of the house. This ensured that my daughter understood those rules and the consequences of breaking them (no cartoons in the car and no treats after finishing the meals).
Similarly, at work, I started setting my own boundaries in terms of work-life balance. I informed my team and my boss that during a certain timeslot, I won't be available as that's the time I pick up my kids and spend time with them until they go to sleep. It has actually made the life of my colleagues and team easier because they are aware of my availability and can plan the meetings/deliverables accordingly. It has made me more productive as well since I am aware of my bandwidth, so I am more conscious of my time which means I have shorter, more impactful meetings. My delivery timelines are more realistic and overall, I am more efficient with my time.
Simplified Logistics = Simplified Life - when the time came to send my son to the daycare, we chose to send him to the same school where our daughter goes to study. Even though this option costs us more, it has simplified our morning logistic immensely. We get them both ready at the same time, drop them off to school together and pick them up together. Their holidays are at the same time and even their teachers sometimes overlap. Overall, this means we have less things to manage which leads to our calendars to be less crowded and for us to remember less things.
The same "less is more" logic is valuable at work too. Even if a project can take a bit of extra time to get delivered, if there is continuity and predictability at work, it makes things easier. The same team focused on similar projects is more efficient as they continue to build expertise and understand how to mesh working styles. You end up with a predictable routine, a cohesive team, and fewer unwelcome surprises.
Teamwork and Harmony - I'm oddly proud of how our weekday mornings have become a smooth operation of dividing tasks. I dress my daughter while my wife handles our son; then we swap so she can finish braiding my daughter's hair (in which I have no experience due to my amazing hairstyle). Then I take them both to the kitchen where I start preparing breakfast, my daughter entertains our son, and my wife is now getting ready for the office. We have breakfast together, pile up in the car and we are off. It's like a small assembly line, each step timed and performed in unison. Boring, predictable and productive.
The same dynamic matters at work. A well-coordinated team is a thing of beauty - everyone knows their roles, deadlines, and responsibilities. I am a firm believer that innovation should be exciting, exploring new ideas and challenges should be exciting. But executing those ideas into actual products, bringing them to the market, managing those projects should be boring. That's how you know your "team machine" is running smoothly.
Celebrating Motherhood
While I've shared plenty about fatherhood, I'd be doing this story a disservice if I didn't talk about motherhood. As parents, we're viewed as two pillars that turn a house into a home - but through the births and care of our two children, I've discovered that motherhood is, without a doubt, the most challenging and rewarding experience I've ever witnessed. I have a fresh appreciation for my own mother these days, thinking about how she raised two boys with limited resources and an unwavering heart.
I like to think of myself as a hands-on parent, always jumping in to share the load. Still, there's only so much I can do. I can't replace my wife feeding our infant every two hours, even when she's bone-tired. When our baby boy was sick and insisted on cuddling only with his mom, I tried my best to relieve her. But he cried so hard I had to give him back, and I felt my own frustration because I couldn't ease her burden. My way of sharing the load was that I took over total responsibility for my daughter's care and during those long nights, once the baby was fed, I would rock it to sleep. I made sure that I supported her as much as possible and did everything in my power to spare her that extra bit of exhaustion.
And let's not forget the professional sacrifice mothers have to make. We are blessed that we live in Spain which has a very generous 4 months maternity policy. But each time my wife returned from maternity leave, it felt like starting all over in her career. And when the kids fell ill, she often had to stay home because they just wanted their mom. I've seen how it affects her progress firsthand. The best thing we husbands can do is stand by them when they vent, support the choices they make, and prove through our actions that we can hold down the fort so they can pursue their careers. We owe them that much - and more.
Why We Sometimes Forget the Basics
As I pieced together these realizations, I wondered how I could know such fundamentals - teamwork, boundaries, workload management - yet occasionally ignore them in my day-to-day job. How did that happen? The old "frog in hot water" analogy came to mind: under continuous pressure, it's easy not to notice when you're overwhelmed until it's too late. Similarly, in our day-to-day work, under pressure of delivery commitments and professional accomplishments, we forget these basic principles.
Children have this remarkable way of yanking us back to what truly matters. Their demands for our time and energy spotlight the gaps in our usual routines and remind us just how vital it is to be present, both at home and at work.
In an AI-Driven World, Stay Human
In the AI driven content world of today, it took me a long time to put these thoughts on paper. Yes, I used AI to help clean up some of the writing here. But the heart of these words and the stories behind them are purely my own. In the race for efficiency, let's not forget the human element.
Final Thoughts
I'm always grateful for the lessons my children continue to teach me. They keep me grounded, nudge me to recalibrate when I'm off-course, and fill my life with equal parts chaos and joy.
To anyone who's juggling parenthood and a career - or even just feeling that life pulls you in a hundred different directions, I hope my reflections show you not to lose sight of personal growth (and fun) that unfolds when you slow down, set the right boundaries, and learn from the people - big and small - who depend on you.
P.S. Yes, 2020 was crazy, but life since then has been anything but dull. While we can't control every global headline, we can shape how we respond and how we care for those around us. Here's to staying grounded, human, and open to the lessons our lives keep teaching us - one child, one project, and one day at a time.